


I'm So Thrilled

by StealthLesbian



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, For Me, No Fandom - Freeform, Working shit out, blowing off steam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-11
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-08-14 12:48:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8014585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StealthLesbian/pseuds/StealthLesbian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a stupid poem I wrote that a friend wanted to put up here. It's sad and dumb, a thing of no one for nothing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm So Thrilled

**Author's Note:**

> I know if you squint there's song lyrics in here. I get that, it's not really original. But I'm going through some stuff and I love music and I just needed to try to compartmentalize some feelings.

I'm so thrilled to finally be failing.  
You don't even know, like shit just keeps getting worse and I'm laughing.  
I'm wondering if I should bother to get the bucket and I can't find the paddle.  
Like fuck it, _sinking is easy._  
Can you see how far we've come?  
One step forward and buried in gravel, digging to the surface.  
I can't even pretend and the shovel is gone.  
The cracks are starting to show and I can't hold the pieces together.  
I can't remember caring and where did that hour go?  
Anger is just love gone to vinegar but you try to do it right though.  
I woke up a stranger to myself and I'm laughing.  
Madness is an emergency exit and drowning is easy.  
My luck always runs out in mid air and I don't feel like dancing anymore.  
Waking up and wondering what my life would mean if it's gone.  
I can't think of anything and I can't remember caring.  
I'm laughing.  
Can you see how far we've come?  
One step forward and buried in gravel.  
You can't ask me to care.  
It would kill me if I did.  
Can you tell me what was ever really special about me?  
Ran out self esteem.  
Powered by gasoline.  
Fuck it.  
My world is burning to the ground.  
I'm laughing.  
I'm so thrilled to be failing.  
Part of a machine.  
I can't be a human being.  
It would kill me if I was.  
My hands are cold.  
Burning is easy.  
Can't wake up and this is not a dream.  
I'm laughing and watching the hours go.  
Making friends with the shadow's on my wall.  
I should get some sleep and I can't wake up.  
Feeling like I'm heading for a break down and I don't know why.  
Buried in gravel, suspended and forward motion is harder than it sounds.  
Breathing isn't easy.  
And I'm laughing  
Too many turns, I've turned out to be wrong.  
It's time I learned that I've known it all along.  
I'm laughing and I've known it all along.  
I'm so thrilled to finally be failing.


End file.
